B*!@#

Am I tripping or are consideration and etiquette at an all-time low? Has it always been, but now we have more access to people, or has my tolerance grown null??? I used to be rude. I was raised in a home that did not wake up handing out salutations. We could walk past each other and not speak without any hard feelings. Yes, Miss Fabulous Morning, learned how to say good morning about 15 years ago, lol, sad but true. Previously I was “brutally honest” and said whatever came to my mind with a skewed filter. I feel blessed for the experience to understand the other side, yet it makes it clear how easy everybody can do better. Being polite and kind does not take that much effort it simply takes consciousness. Steadfastness to slowing down and thinking, not only on what to speak but when to or if it’s even necessary to.

 So many things require silence, and humans are filling it up with noise. Hastily giving opinions and jumping to conclusions with barely any consideration, claiming it’s “their truth” or the freedom of expression, I hear all of that but it’s also contemptible My Love. It’s tacky, mean and pointless. These freedoms and “truths” are selfish to share or say and lack the grace we all need. Please note I’m not saying any of this to box yourself into society’s rules. Quite the opposite; know the rules, drop them on their head, break them apart, and make new ones in such a way that it healthily changes the trajectory for more than just yourself. Humanity needs kindness, not more opinions. Speak for joy or pain or whatever is necessary yet be aware. Be considerate. Seriously, what’s the point of speaking if you don’t care how your audience receives it?

Consideration isn’t a selfless act that neglects you and only benefits others it’s being intentional, gentle, and kind. At first, it may feel like you’re limiting your freedom of speech but you are practicing proper use of the power of speech. It’s responsible self-care. When creating boundaries I sometimes fear being perceived as a bitch and I have to remind myself assertiveness is a powerful act of self-care. Our thoughts, our words, and our actions are powerful, we should share them to elevate each other in passing, online, or anywhere. Be the kind of person you want your kids to live in the world with; this is how we make a change that has a ripple effect on society as a whole.

So, as we move into this next week, month, and end of the year, shit into the rest of our lives, please remember to be considerate of yourself and others. Pray for gentleness. Take inventory of your actions and the feelings you experience daily. Pay attention to your words and opinions, and why you say them. Are you talking to fill the silence, be mean or do you have something to actually say??? Do not overthink it and remember this is not performative, you still get to be all of the things you are yet let’s work on being us while holding space for others. The world needs you, exactly as you are, and all the versions you’ll morph into, and that’s why we gotta be a safe space for each other. Safe spaces free from malice, judgment, and inconsideration. #SincerelyJam🤟🏾